The Bump and The Bubble – Ten ‘Normal’ things a new-born brings
Being pregnant is exciting. You feel special, you feel new, you feel different, you feel interesting, you feel important… and then you have your baby and you feel….?
I am freshly back from a visit to a brand new mummy with a new-born and I realise that I forgot how tough the first few weeks can be.
Having a baby and becoming a mummy is still VERY exciting – but there can be a kind of unexpected disappointed that sets in as the ‘new normal’ settles in around you and your new family. (New-Normal = The-not-so-exciting-just-getting-by-kind-of-normal).
The bump has been a beautiful bubble of idealism that has suddenly popped.
What is the ‘new-born normal’ to expect? Don’t all new mummies fly around on their feet with the new all-consuming love they feel for their new baby? Don’t the hormones that breastfeeding brings make you feel elated? Don’t visitors shower you with gifts and yummy goodies to keep you glowing? Doesn’t the new-mummy-feeling make you feel wonderful?
Pop. There went the bubble.
Nobody wants to tell you how hard it will be when you have your baby because they don’t want to burst your bubble. And if people do tell you how hard it will be, you want to slap them – because it is your pregnancy and your baby will be different. In most cases though (from talking to friends and other new mummies), there is always a little ‘bubble’ that pops.
“I didn’t expect it to be like this” is a common phrase uttered by over-tired new parents. Of course there are numerous positives that arrive with your new little bundle (hence bundle of ‘joy’) but the ‘new-normal’ of being a new parent can still come as an unwelcome surprise.
New mummies can feel guilty for not feeling elated when instead they feel a little flat – or in keeping with the bubble analogy – deflated. It is important to know that the slightly deflated feeling is part of the new-normal (don’t worry – it will go away!).
But what else is normal in this life-changing time? Here are ten ‘normals’ to add to the list – because you are not alone and they say it takes a village to raise a baby for a good reason. There are only two letters distinguishing deflated from elated.
You will get back there – but you need some downtime, sleep, good meals, support and a period of adjustment first.
Ten ‘normal’ things a newborn brings
- It is normal to feel overwhelmed
- It is normal to need support to breastfeed
- It is normal to feel frustrated
- It is normal to miss your personal space
- It is normal to find it difficult to let ‘animal’ instincts take over
- It is normal to stay in your pyjamas
- It is normal to find visitors less than helpful
- It is normal to forget to feed yourself
- It is normal to be sleep-deprived
- It is normal to feel that everything you feel is not normal
Expect change when you are expecting. Accept change when baby arrives (and change the baby regularly).
Enjoy the change and your transformation as a new parent. Love Outie.