Terms and Conditions of Pregnancy
The following terms and conditions are set out as a binding agreement between two parties – the mother (henceforth referred to as ‘the landlord’) and the baby (henceforth referred to as ‘the tenant’).
1) The landlord is responsible for providing sound accommodation for the full duration of the tenancy.
2) There will be no smoking by either the landlord or the tenant on site.
3) Meals will be provided on demand and the landlord understands that the demands of the tenant may exceed normal consumption expectations.
4) Both parties are in agreement that large deliveries of chocolate or other foodstuffs are predicted at odd hours.
5) The landlord reserves the right to schedule house inspections via ultrasound at regular intervals.
6) The chosen title of the tenant (mr or miss) may change without prior notice.
7) The end date of the tenancy is unknown and both parties agree that the tenancy shall not exceed ten months or else the tenant will be induced to leave via a third party.
8) The landlord accepts that the tenant may choose to end the tenancy early.
9) Damages incurred to property will not be held against the tenant.
10) The status of the landlord may change to milk maid after eviction.
Outie: From belly-bumps to boo-boos, babies to boobies – we have got you covered.
Add your own clauses! If you have anything to add, add it below!