The Best Baby-Themed Dad jokes! Giggle or cringe – you decide.

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What does this cheerio bandit have in common with pregnancy?

Both are the result of playing with sausages.

 

Why do baby bees need to be wrapped up at night?

Swarm.

 

What does a pregnant lady’s walk and a baby ready for bed have in common?

Swaddle.

 

What do you call bees that make milk?

Boo Bees!

 

Why are some cloth nappies a rip off?

Because some have velcro.

 

Why don’t parents let toddlers play with cheese graters?

They have grater problems.

 

Why do crabs struggle with parenthood?

They’re shellfish.

 

Why should midwives teach geometry?

Without it, birth would be pointless.

 

Why are baby doctors called pediatricians?

Most people prefer adult doctors anyway.

 

Why is a leaky nappy a problem?

Urine trouble.

 

How do you organise a space-themed first birthday party?

You planet.

 

How do you make a baby hankie dance?

You put a baby boogie in it.

 

What do you call a baby sheep with no legs?

A cloud.

 

Where does Napoleon keep his armies?

In his sleevies.

 

Why do big cats need so many paternity tests?

Because of the cheetahs.

 

Why are some babies born clean?

Because they had a baby shower.

 

What’s your best Dad joke? (Bad joke)

 

 

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